The thing I find the most fascinating about humans is that there’s a little bit of madness in all of us.
In all of us there’s this untamed jungle of wildness hiding and waiting.
Is it our ability to love that sets it free within us?
Is it that openness in the moments where we are as naked with our thoughts as we are with our shadows with the ones
we choose to love
that is the difference between optimism and bitterness?
What is it about us
that despite our guarded weaknesses
the flailing mass of contradictions
the need to keep our own absurdities company
the tendency to perceive ourselves as defective, irreparable or unworthy
that we still have the capacity to love fiercely?
There’s a little bit of magic in that don’t you think?
If I could be granted a super power
It would be to possess the ability to look at everyone I meet and see a galaxy
with each star in it a memory they cherish along with the names and the stories of everyone they have ever loved.
Yeah I know that I’m too curious.
I want to know everything for no other reason than if I can know something I should know something
And I just want to understand people completely.
I want to know how every tale they have ever been part of has been woven from the beginning to the end.
I want to savour the quiet silence in our connection and their vulnerability when they speak and enjoy their presence in the telling of it.
Aren’t we all stories anyway?
I want to know where they think they fit in the great scheme of things and how it came to be that every single choice they made led them to the moment where they managed to set foot in my life and mine wandered into theirs.
Let me be clear that I’m no wordsmith.
I lack the grace and charm to put you at ease like some.
My laugh isn’t coquettish.
My eyes don’t sparkle.
I don’t like hugs and I’m often not really sure what I bring to the table.
But I can listen and I want to…
So there’s that.
Behind the poem:
I ended it on that note on purpose. For some reason it just made me laugh. It’s actually showing you more about me than I originally intended it to. I am the sort of person that’ll entertain an idea and explore it and chase after it with enthusiasm and then all of a sudden be like “I really like bananas.” End thought chasing moment.
I wrote this because despite being introverted and somewhat anti-social people have always fascinated me. I would be a total recluse if not for the fact that my curiosity gets the better of me and I’m drawn out of my cave in response. I have always loved listening to another persons’ story. I have loved the connection and closeness that comes with a person choosing to share a tale or two with me. It’s not that I’m nosy (well I am but at least I’m not annoying about it), It’s just in my nature to want to know things, about anything really. I want to understand everything.
I’ve always admired people that despite suffering, manage to be kind and not give in to the bitterness. I can fall madly in love with a man that can do that. I will! I think that ability to love hard no matter how damaged you were by someone else….that’s kind of magical. That’s all the magic I would ever want or need in my life.
I don’t like what people do, to themselves and to each other, but in general I do love them even if it’s from a distance.